Mourning rambleings

1.Strange thing about this, is that I have not really broken down as yet. I know it will happen when ready.
2.When I look at pictures of Mom, I get teary eyed, and a lump in my throat, but that is it. I have cried a few times, but not major as yet. Maybe I won't? When I keep thinking I have to call her to see how she is doing, then I think, Oh. She is not there; I get a lump in my throat.
3.I feel for my sister. Since she lived near by, she did all my moms banking, taking her to Dr's etc. She certainly is feeling the void.
4. When my partner passed, I was a mess. I held on to some of his clothes for quite awhile. Every time I smelled his scent on them, I would fall apart. But that was a different type of relationship
5. I feel it building up. Maybe when we do the 2 memorial functions next month, it may happen? Or maybe during the holidays.
6. I have been through this before, with my dad, grandmother, and aunts.... this is just a strange and normal process.

People with Dog Heads (or dogs with people bodies) :)

I forgot about this well done video :)

off again to another

birthday brunch, Octavia Lounge; good food and free flowing Mimosas. All these B-day's all of a sudden!
Then the Eagle later of course :)

(no subject)

1, Brunch was great at Octavia Lounge. Instead of mimosas, we had bloody Marys
2. Then off to the Eagle
3. Actually the weather was great! Foggy , but warm. I love being there with my friends.
4. Then off to 440, for a fund raiser. Hot men, hot friends, and good music (I asked the DJ to play California Dreaming... and he did!). And I must say , he was blown away by my Cher "ohhhhhhhh" imitation, when he started playing Cher tunes).
5. Then to the Edge... at that point I was sick of beer... so sodas were the beverage..... ran into old friends again.
6. Then to the Loan Star.... OK this is where it is not so fun.. this guy, who I have been cruising for months, and have talked to him in the past... never really showed any interest in me, now walks up and stands next to me, on the stairs overlooking the patio. OK? Am I to say something to him? I only have been smiling, saying hi to him for months, with no interest from him. So. I was a bitch today. I pretended I did not notice him next to me (dying to say hi of course). Ok I blew it. But I wish I could blow it. Then, I run into another guy.... been with him before. I asked him how he is doing. For 20 minutes, it is his life story. Which is fine. But not once, did he ask, how was I doing. So my interest in him has dwindled again. This has been happening to me a lot lately. I am interested in them.... but at least show some interest in me. So after his life story, I left. I have to be up early anyway. I guess I was expecting too much, which is fine. Aside from bars, and the internet, is there any other place to meet someone? Supermarket? Rest Stops?(just kidding... closed anyway)
7. Sometimes this bar stuff can also be annoying. But we got to keep trying :)
8 Off to sleep. Up at 5am :(.