cellboy

* Sometimes stays in bed until after 5 am.
* In his sock drawer, you find pictures of women without bonnets.
* Shows up at barn raisings in full “Kiss” makeup.
* When you criticize him, he yells, “Thou sucketh!”
* His name is Jebediah, but he goes by “Jeb Daddy.”
* Defiantly says, “If I had a radio, I’d listen to rap.”
* You come upon his secret stash of colored socks.
* Uses slang expression: “Talk to the hand, ’cause the beard ain’t listening.”
* Was recently pulled over for “driving under the influence of cottage cheese.”
* He’s wearing his big black hat backwards.